I could almost consider this post as the beginning of Becoming since this is the first post of the blog. However, in actuality the idea of Becoming was conceived over 10 years ago. I knew that I was miserable on my job as a computer programmer so I began writing down ideas of what I would want to do (yes, while at work). Trying to think on things I liked and was good at doing, my talents seemed to be more of what I considered to be intangible. My best friend, Daphne could sing and write songs. Not me. My other best friend, Joseph fondly known as “Fella” had been called into ministry as a pastor and was well on his way to starting his church. Not me. I was good at listening, keeping everyone’s secrets, and giving advice. Having a degree in Computer Science, I wasn’t quite sure how I could turn these qualities into a career.
Rather than focusing on turning my skills into a career, I decided to assess the things that give me energy. Innately an introvert, my energy is usually drawn from alone time. However, I love learning and sharing knowledge. I feed off people’s energy that share their dreams and goals with me. I watch Oprah’s Life class (really all things Oprah) religiously, read and listen to anything from Elizabeth Gilbert, and long to have a conversation with Susan L. Taylor, former editor-in-chief of Essence. (Side note: The ultimate for me is to have a conversation with Oprah but I would be so star-struck that the conversation would be one-sided with her wondering if I’m mute and why my bottom lip is trembling. Further, I probably wouldn’t hear anything she’s saying for I would be focused on not letting her see me go into convulsions. The trembling bottom lip is the beginnings of the convulsions. For those reasons, I won’t be pursuing a meet and greet with Oprah.)
Bottom line, I’m motivated by hearing others success stories which includes or leads to deep meaningful conversation.
Over the years, my ideas about Becoming have been numerous, few, changed, and uncertain at times and I will be sharing or implementing them with you throughout our journey together. However, the foundation has always been the same, which hinges on my belief: We can be and do anything we want through knowledge and persistence. Here’s how…
1. Spend time learning about you
What do you want? Are you trying to start or change a career or even start a business? Do you want to lose weight? Do you want to run a 5k or marathon? What do you like? How do you like spending your time? These are some of the questions you should be asking yourself. Some answers you will know immediately and others you will need time to ponder. Upon answering the questions, make sure you have clarity on why you are pursuing this goal. Understanding why will dictate how far you’re willing to go to reach your goals.
2. If you can conceive it then you can achieve it but you first have to believe it.
It is so easy for us to list reasons why the pursuit of certain goals will not succeed. This leads me to believe that you don’t believe in what you’re pursuing and you really don’t believe in yourself. If you have a conversation with someone you would consider to be successful, you would quickly realize that at some point they had to believe in what they were doing and believe that they can do it. At the same time, you have to incorporate a belief that God is working with and through you. If you don’t believe in what you’re pursuing, then you won’t give it the energy, discipline, and the time needed to succeed.
3. The pursuit
Now that you have decided on your goal and have clarity on why you are pursuing it, it’s time to put an action plan together. Create small measurable tasks and each completed task is one step closer to the fruition of your pursuit. In full transparency, this is where I struggle. I come up with great ideas but would fall short on the actual plan to implement the idea. I would jump in head first biting off more than I could chew. As a result, I would give up or never start. I finally realized that I had to take small steps along with believing in what I was pursuing.
4. Be mindful of your surroundings
You can only go as far as the people around you. If you have decided to lose 20lbs through diet and exercise, you can’t spend a lot of time with people who are going out to eat every other day and not exercising. The people who are around you have the biggest influence on you. That means you should have people in your circle with similar ideas, aspiring to similar goals, or have reached similar goals. This will help you to be accountable and keep you encouraged.
Your surroundings also includes where you’re spending your time. If a great deal of your time is spent at home looking at tv watching other people live their lives, I can assure you that you will not be successful. It’s important to be where whatever you’re trying to do is happening. If you want to be a writer, take a writing class at the local community college. Attend a workshop. Join a support group. Your face has to be in the place (I know…corny!)
I hope these few suggestions have sparked some ideas or encouraged you in some way. I would love for you to share your goals, hopes, and dreams in the comments below. Maybe we can make some connections and do a little networking.