Right now, it’s taking me everything I have to write this post. Not because of writer’s block, but because for some strange reason I’d rather be doing nothing. Doing nothing is absolutely the easiest thing to do and I do it well. Most of my life I would quickly finish a task so that I could do nothing. See, I can be really lazy and it’s something I’ve been trying to overcome for a long time now. I remember as a child asking my grandmother to pray that I not be lazy anymore. The struggle is real!
Ordinarily, it had not been that big of a deal as I have been able to find some levels of success despite the laziness. However, the laziness feeds my procrastination and the procrastination prevents me from accomplishing goals or pursuing endeavors. Plus, the success I have found could be considered as mediocre at best. As I’ve grown older, I see how laziness has negatively impacted my life.
For the last 15 years, I have complained about how life wasn’t the way I wanted it. There were glimpses here and there of my “ideal life” but never any consistency. I would dream hopelessly of the day that I would be doing exactly what I wanted to do. For most of those years, I felt that I didn’t have clarity on what I should be doing so I never truly worked wholeheartedly towards creating that “ideal life”.
What I realized is that I didn’t lack clarity and a lot of this was due to laziness fed by fear and insecurity. There’s less pressure to succeed and fewer worries of failing if you’re doing nothing. At the same time, life is less fulfilling and the dreams of an “ideal life” will remain a dream as life continues to pass us by.
Thoughts of laziness:
“I’m a great writer and would love to write screenplays. First, let me catch up on my shows. I wonder what’s happening on the Real Houseswives of some city.” (The only thing “real” about these shows is that they are real stupid!)
“My doctor says I need to exercise and eat healthier if I want to improve my blood pressure and overall health. Let me drive over here to McDonald’s.” (At least, walk to McDonald’s!)
“I want to travel the world and experience other cultures! I guess I’ll sit here and watch House Hunters International.” (Watching and doing are two very different things.)
“I love cooking and making meals for my family. I have so many ideas for a food business and friends and family are encouraging me to pursue it. I’ll come up with a plan after I take a nap.” (This is so me! I am a lover of my sleep, but while I’m sleeping others are planning and accomplishing.)
These are just a few thoughts that I and others have had which equates to laziness. It’s an every day battle for me but I have to push through it in order to find the success I’m seeking. How do I fight against laziness? I imagine myself continuing life as is never giving myself the opportunity to do or have more. (It may not be a consistent method but it‘s effective enough to have me up at 3:04 am writing this post.) Wouldn’t it be a shame to reflect on life at 90 years old and all that can be said is, “When I was younger I had big dreams, but instead I watched reality TV while eating a Big Mac and fries. At least McDonald’s didn’t kill me and I was able to get a lot of sleep.”